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"The
budget should be balanced, the Treasury should be refilled, public debt
should be reduced, the arrogance of officialdom should be tempered and
controlled, and the assistance to foreign lands should be curtailed lest
Rome become bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living
on public assistance." - Cicero - 55 BC
Life as it was has
changed. You may have lost your job at the local car dealership or maybe
your home is in foreclosure or you go to the grocery store and the cost
of everything went up. Your 401k is demolished. You wonder what will happen
next. You're worried and afraid. You have lost control over some part
of your life. You may have lost control over a great portion of your life
and are not happy. Complaining doesn't help. What can you do?
CONTROL
YOUR REACTIONS
It's natural to react when you feel like a victim to circumstances beyond
your control so begin by recognizing your reactions. Do you feel yourself
getting angry or wanting to escape and forget about the situation? Notice
changes in your body, your breathing, your negative mind chatter.
See Negative
Mind Chatter, These are related to your emotions. Don't
let your emotions make your decisions.
What to do.
If you really want to have control over your life, begin with controlling
your thoughts. When you realize you are reacting, Stop! Take a deep breath.
If you are standing, sit down if possible. Say, "Stop this now!"
If you are alone, say it out loud. Otherwise, say it to yourself. Take
several deep breaths. Count backward from 10 to 1, taking a deep breath
with each number. Think about something relaxing such as a past vacation
or spending time with friends. You might think about a desert island at
sunset with the water lapping on the beach. Develop an inexpensive hobby
to help you relax. This will help stop the downward spiral of discouragement.
You can't think clearly if you are stressed out.
What not to do.
Don't use a hobby as an escape to pretend that everything is going to
be okay if you ignore it. Don't listen to tales of woe. Complaining without
finding solutions only creates more stress. A negative attitude can cause
physical as well as emotional weakness. It creates more stress and reduces
your ability to fight off illness. Mentally it reduces your ability to
see things clearly and objectively. Restrict your intake of negative information
through TV, radio, internet or people who only want to complain. A little
goes a long way, especially if the media only reports how terrible things
are and offers no positive solutions.
STRENGTH
OF CHARACTER
Now that you can approach the situation objectively, consider your options.
Look into your soul and pull out that inner drive that makes you strong
and able to overcome. Remember times when you overcame an obstacle. Tell
yourself that you can do anything you need, to do to handle any situation
you need to handle. Encourage yourself. You need to be positive and encouraging
to those around you. When they complain about their lives, remind them
of their ability to cope. Remind them that you are there for them and
you expect them to be there for you. This will also help you to remember
that you can do it too. Whether they realize it or not, they need you.
We all need others. This is the time to get to know your family and neighbors,
to be there for each other, to encourage each other. Surround yourself
with other overcoming people. Recognize your strong points and build alliances
with people who have the strengths you don't have. See
Personality
Quiz and Using
Your Strengths. Look at the characteristics
and know that these are your strong points to offer others and to help
you succeed.
"Each
person has a unique role to play, a particular set of gifts and abilities
to make a difference in the world. No one else can make your contribution
but you. You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be
the world to one person." - Dr. Ron Wolfon
FINANCIAL
OPTIONS
We all will have to change our lifestyles. Nobody likes to live on a lower
standard, but this may be what is required. There are proactive things
we can do, like spend less or prioritize or save until we have the money
for something. We may have to buy only what we need, not what we want
and take pride in a larger savings account. A one dollar fast food seems
like a small thing, but those dollars add up.
"A
penny saved is a penny earned." - Ben Franklin
Practical Ideas
Also remember that ad people get paid when they get you to buy. You must
resist. Every time you are ready to spend money on something, consider
how important it is. Make a wish list and buy it only when you have the
money for it. Clipping coupons can save money. Buy a car when you need
it, not because you always buy one after three years. Buy a moderately
priced car and get one that is fairly new. Driving a new car off the lot
drops the trade-in value immensely. However, now is a good time to buy
many things because the businesses are hurting and prices are low. Consider
the options. Your kids don't need the latest smartphones. When buying
appliances, top of the line items with pushbuttons need repairs first.
Don't eat out. Have family meals together as a time to encourage each
other and bond even more. Recreation can be free. Go on a picnic. Instead
of going to a movie, rent a DVD and have a bowl of popcorn. If you are
thinking of another pet, think it through. The cost can be exorbitant
with vet fees even if you can afford the food. What will you do if it
gets hit by a car and the vet needs hundreds of dollars? Think ahead.
There are books and as things get worse, programs that help you figure
out how to save more money. Do an internet search on how to save money.
There are government plans to help you in an emergency.
If you still have
a good job, make sure you are indispensable. Come early, stay late and
put in a full 8 hours. Make people want to keep you. Even with a good
income, it's wise to begin spending less and saving for a possible layoff.
Aim for enough savings to live on for one year. This is extremely important.
If you are laid off
and interested in starting a business, consider anything that is a renewable
commodity. People always need toilet paper. They don't always need life
insurance. Anything that involves the growing older population should
make money. This can include day care for the elderly or helping people
sell property and goods after a relative dies.
IT'S
UP TO YOU
You may have to separate yourself from material comfort and possessions.
Do without a little at a time. Work through the grieving process. See
Getting
Stuck in the Grief Process. You may be surprised
to find that possessions don't mean as much as you thought. More material
things mean less freedom. You may think belongings bring you security,
but security comes from within.
For practical purposes,
look at how your grandparents or great-grandparents lived. They had gardens
and canned their own food. They hung their clothes on clotheslines. They
worked hard, harder physically than we normally do, but they survived.
Your life will not be easy and will require you to work harder, but you
can do it and when you do, you will be pleased with yourself and a positive
influence on those around you.
When you keep your
eyes on what you have lost, it keeps you from appreciating what you do
have or what you can have. Wisdom and perseverance can draw out the character
within to weather the storms, as uncomfortable as they may be. Learn to
be at peace with yourself. Learn to relax so your brain can think clearly.
Be proactive, not reactive. Act on logical decisions based on your principles
and values, not emotions that fluctuate from one moment to another. You
can do it. See
How
to Handle Change.
©
Copyright Echod Enterprise 2009
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